Friday, March 03, 2006

Burden of Proof

I'm happy to report that I have indeed been knitting. I managed to turn the heel and get past the gusset decreasing on the Glad Ragg socks yesterday. The more I knit these socks the more I love them. I'm so in love with them that I'm madly stocking up on all kinds of tweed yarns. Of course it's silly to think I'll actually knit as many pairs of socks as I have yarn for, but I'm that into them to buy every tweed yarn that strikes my fancy just in case I should decide to knit that many more pairs of them. Darcie loves them too. She wants a pair in blue with blue beads. I bought a great Regia tweed in blue (the burgundy is for my mom) the other day at Sue's that I think she'll love. I'm going to surprise her with them so I'm not going to show her the yarn. Plus, if I show her the yarn she'll bug every day between now and the time the socks are actually finished. Less pressure. That's what I'm all about these days.

Now, not to be a downer or anything, but back on the 18th when we picked Dan and Darcie up from visitation with their father Darcie showed me bruises that my ex's new wife left on each side of her neck when she grabbed her and started choking her. Nice huh? I immediately called Child Protective Services and reported what had happened. Then I called our local police department to see if I should bring her to the ER or to them to have photos taken for documentation purposes. The village police came here and talked to Darcie and took photos but since my ex lives outside the village there was nothing more they could do. They recommended taking her to the ER and to the State Police. The woman for our county of CPS called just after they left and highly recommended the same. So we headed to the ER first and then to the Trooper barracks immediately after. We returned home after 1 in the morning and Darcie and Dailaesse were both exhausted. I was too worked up to sleep and stayed up until 4. Darcie and the ex's wife had an argument because the ex's oldest son (he's 3 and very abusive plus he's never scolded when he hurts one of the kids) kicked Darcie in the head. Darcie got up to go to her room so he wouldn't be able kick her anymore. Ex's wife blocked her way and told her to sit down and finish watching the movie. Darcie refused and finally got the wife to move by telling her she had to use the bathroom. Wife blocks Darcie again when she comes out of the bathroom and tells her she wouldn't have gotten kicked had she just got up and moved out of her spot for the 3 year old monster. They continue to argue, Darcie starts to cry and then the wife apologizes...but is snotty about it. She steps towards Darcie to hug her and Darcie steps back away from her because she's sad and angry and doesn't want to be touched. Wife steps towards her again and Darcie puts her arms behind her back and steps back once more. Wife reaches out and grabs Darcie by the neck and starts choking her. She's shaking Darcie, pinching and digging her nails into her neck at the same time. She finally lets her go and Darcie goes to her room. CPS shows up Sunday afternoon to speak with Darcie. She talks to me after and tells me to make an appointment with Probation immediately to file a petition to get the visitation reduced. I call first thing Tuesday morning (of course this whole thing happened on a holiday weekend) and they can't get me in until the 6th. WTF??? The trooper that talked to Darcie the night we went out called that Wednesday and said he had more papers for me to sign because the District Attorney for our county doesn't feel there's enough evidence to support an assault charge even though the doctor at the ER listed that as the diagnosis for the bruises. Now they're going to try to get a conviction under the new domestic violence laws. He'll call me later the same day or the next. I haven't heard anything as of 6pm on the 23rd so I call him. The asshole DA has now decided that there isn't enough evidence for even a harassment charge. Again, WTF??? How much more evidence do they need? The wretched wench left bruises on my daughters neck that lasted for days and they don't have enough evidence? So the only other hope we have of being able to get something done is with Probation on Monday. I have to say, I'm not hopeful. This county is so backwards that it's an awful thing. They protect the parents that abuse the children, not the children being abused. Darcie hasn't slept since this all happened and needless to say, I haven't either. She's highly emotional and so am I. I'm frustrated because I can't seem to do anything to make a difference for them. I'm ready to pack us all up and move to Mexico in the middle of the night.

If you made it this far, bless you. :-) I'm off to do some shopping today. That always helps to lift my spirits. I need a few groceries, a new door for the bathroom and yarn. And yes I DO need yarn. LOL Hope you're all doing well! Oh, I'll be handing out matches for the mini secret pal by the end of the weekend. If you previously signed up and have changed your mind because I've been so damned poky I'll certainly understand, just drop me a note to let me know. And, since I have been so poky, if you'd like to join in, let me know by midnight tomorrow night and I'll be happy to add you to the swap.

10 comments:

SDMC said...

Bless both your hearts! I am so sorry.

Diane said...

OMG, that's so awful. Poor Darcie must have been frightened beyond belief. I can't imagine why your ex wants the kids to visit since his wife obviously doesn't like them. Sending good thoughts your way.

Anonymous said...

That is just to horrible for the kids and you to go through all that. Men can be so very selfish and not realize what's happening. I am sorry your going through this..

*Hugs*

Your SP

Susan said...

Oh no...I'm really sorry to hear that you went through this. I hope the law will protect your family. My thoughts are with you.

Leslie said...

Blessings to you and the girls. Where was Dan when his happened? I wouldn't have expected him to get involved (or thought it safe for him to try to intervene) but it would have been nice if his witness testimony could have been added.

I assume, although you didn't say it, you contacted the new attorney you saw last month. Was s/he able to suggest anything? And can't this whole documented incident go on record when you're getting that visitation hearing you were trying for?

Please do stay in touch, Kerry, and let us know. Many of us care and are concerned.

Hugs to you.

Ollie said...

how awful. I'm so sorry for all that you & your family have gone thru. better days are ahead, you'll see, & as always you'll all be in my prayers. god bless. meg

Sandra Knapp said...

I'm so sorry that you and Darcie had to suffer through this, and then have insult added to injury by some stupid DA. I'm sure your attorney can get more done for you or make good use of this incident on your behalf. I know it's difficult, but try and be patient and bide your time. Your day is coming, and the Ex will finally get his! My thoughts and best wishes are with you all.

Karen said...

I'm so sorry to hear about what you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Lisa said...

What a nightmare! I'm so sorry you are going through this. Consider yourself hugged!

Shelby said...

Your poor baby! I can't believe how the system sometimes just doesn't work. You and the kids are in my thoughts.

Shelby